I tried to call the NHS24 line about swine flu, all I got was crackling.
This little piggy went to market,
This little piggy stayed at home,
This little piggy had roast beef,
This little piggy had none.
And this little piggy had influenza A virus subtype hemagglutinin protein 1 neuraminidase protein 1
I hear there's been some cases of Swine Flu in Texas.
Surely that qualifies it as an STD now.